Coalesce
by S.E. Mellark
Summary: AU. Alfred loses something important at the start of the year and spends the next twelve months playing catch-up with himself.


_Author's Note: _I wanted to see what I could bullshit while watching the last seven episodes of Brotherhood for the 90th time. Pretty pleased with the results if I'm being honest. I'm glad my first update/story of 2014 is for my OTP.

**Warnings:** I like my AU Englands feisty and my Americas feistier, and that showed here, I'm so sorry.

_Disclaimer: _I do not own Hetalia and I most likely never will.

* * *

New Years was supposed to mark a new beginning, or so Alfred has always believed.

When he was a kid, his parents used to sit him and his brother down the day before and have them write their resolutions, though Alfred's "Be even awesomer" never compared to Matthew's "Win a sports championship" or even Arthur's "Maintain superior honor role." Truthfully, Alfred never cared much. Writing something down on a piece of paper didn't mean the likelihood of it actually happening would somehow increase.

And besides. His New Years resolutions usually consisted of things he could never tell his parents, things he would only share with Arthur, because the other boy usually shared the same ones.

"You put 'Come out' as number five." Arthur said earlier that night, jaded eyes roaming over Alfred's hasty scrawl with a slight smirk on chapped lips. "Well done. A whole two numbers up from last year's list."

"Hey, it's only number four on yours, Artie. That's not much better!"

"I have more pressing matters to attend to, love. As you can see, 'Piss my parents off less' is number two. Coming out would only complicate that one, after all."

"Whatever you say, dude."

The party was more interesting than usual, if only because Alfred's dad didn't really care if his son sneaked a few sips of beer here and there, though by the time the ball was beginning to drop across the country in New York, Alfred had drank enough to start feeling the effects. Suddenly Arthur's presence was more maddening than usual, and maybe Arthur was playing up the bedroom eyes a little, though Alfred could've imagined the whole thing.

All he knew for a few desperate seconds was that he wanted to get his boyfriend alone for at least half an hour to ring in the new year, though when Alfred started to reach for him, something completely different caught his attention.

A man was kneeling down in the middle of his living room, a black velvet box in one hand, mouth moving as he recited words to some woman who looked like she was about to cry. She nodded slowly, tears were shed, and the gathered friends and neighbors clapped and shouted as the clock tolled twelve. The newly engaged couple then kissed in that overly clichéd manner that Alfred had only a few seconds previously been hoping to recreate.

But as congratulations ensued, a sickening feeling overtook him, and Alfred found himself vomiting all over himself and Arthur. It should've been embarrassing to have his boyfriend help him up and guide him away from any curious eyes, though Arthur appeared to be just as horrified, tears building in his eyes as he wiped a trail of dirtied saliva from the corner of Alfred's mouth.

It was only because of Arthur's equally unenthused reaction that Alfred knew he hadn't imagined watching his dad propose to Arthur's mom.

* * *

Their parents met at a children's hospital when Matthew was four and Alfred and Arthur were about five. Alfred didn't remember the details, only knew that his younger brother and Arthur both had been terribly sick at the time, and the stressful situation had created some sort of bond between his parents and Arthur's that remained strong even after they all left the hospital.

It never bothered Alfred much, being so close to someone who wasn't his own brother, and Arthur had certainly been an interesting one. They were both loud and fairly aggressive as children, two boys who really didn't know when to shut up, and they created trouble wherever they went. Since Matthew was pretty frail as a kid, he got picked on a lot in elementary school, and Alfred and Arthur bonded over their shared protective natures, as well as their overall lackluster attitude toward life and people in general.

Alfred mellowed considerably as time went on, becoming more of a person who sat back and let things happen as they were, didn't get involved if he didn't have to, though he was a person the kids at school handled carefully if they knew his reputation. Arthur simply became quieter, didn't cause a scene when he knew someone important was watching, and while he aced all his classes and participated in school events without a fuss, the teachers always kept an eye on him.

Maybe it was the stud in his ear or the tattoo that Arthur couldn't always keep hidden that deemed him a person of suspicion. Arthur was always doing that, making his outer appearance a bit rough just to see someone's reaction when the person underneath the piercings and tattoos was a pretty sweet guy, someone that Alfred had seen on multiple occasions hugging stuffed animals and picking up younger kids if they fell on the playground.

The whole mutual attraction thing happened gradually over the many years they spent living attached at the hip, and Alfred wasn't overly bothered when Arthur started playing with his hair or falling asleep with his head in Alfred's lap or "accidentally" palming Alfred's crotch, only knew that it felt good and he didn't hate it, so why the fuck not? He'd always been attracted to whoever – gender, race, or identity had never once mattered – and he suspected Arthur was the same way, though they'd never sat down and had a formal discussion about it.

It was difficult to keep from their parents, if only because they all spent a lot of time together and Alfred and Arthur both were lascivious bastards most of the time. His parents weren't homophobic and neither were Arthur's, so that wasn't much of an issue. Alfred just wasn't too keen to tell his parents that his first real relationship had only begun out of a mutual decision to fool around when boredom struck, or that their weekly sleepovers weren't so innocent anymore and that there was a reason Matthew had decided to suddenly stop taking part.

Alfred wanted to say _something_, though, if only so he could slap that French idiot's hand away when he groped Arthur's ass during school or kindly tell Arthur's mom to stop trying to play match maker when her son was obviously not available.

They were going to make the announcement that year, or so they'd decided, but suddenly the divorce and marriage plans were announced and the word "brothers" was tossed around with much more weight than before.

* * *

The wedding took place a whole two fucking weeks after New Years, way before the ink on the divorce papers had even dried. Alfred didn't bother to show up, choosing instead to stay home with his mom while Arthur and Matthew went to show what little support they had for their parents' sudden union. None of them could recall noticing anything different in the weeks and months leading up to the New Year's party. Their parents still lived in their respective houses, kissed their spouses at the beginning and end of every day, and never once let on to their sons that anything was less than perfect.

It wasn't until Alfred had to decide between households that he began to realize things between his parents weren't fine and hadn't been for years.

"I can't believe you didn't go. Your dad must be pissed."

Alfred shrugged, blowing a bubble and gnashing it harshly in his teeth as he glared at the television screen, hands stuffed in the pockets of his sweatshirt and sock-covered feet kicked up on the coffee table. "I probably would've raised my hand to object and made a complete ass of myself."

She smiled at that, and Alfred watched her with a growing desperation, aching to know why his dad filed for divorce and especially why no one had said anything. Their home life had been fine. They were well off even with the state of the economy and they ate dinner as a family every day. She and his dad had been high school sweethearts, and everyone always said they were perfect for one another.

"I chose to live here with you because I figured you would be the one to tell me what the actual fuck is going on." Alfred said loudly, though that wasn't true. He'd always been attached to his mother, and the thought of staying behind while she moved houses had been unbearable, even if the decision took him further away from Matthew and Arthur. He still wasn't sure why Matt had decided to stay with their dad, if it was out of some remaining sense of loyalty or something else, but it was stupid, and Alfred didn't like it.

"I'd tell you if I knew, baby." His mom sighed, and Alfred felt a fresh wave of nausea at her tone. "Things had been… dying down for years until one day your dad told me he'd fallen out of love with me. What else could I have done but say okay? We didn't tell you and Mattie because finals were coming up, and you were getting ready to take your ACT again. We didn't want to worry you boys."

"I thought you guys were conforming to polygamy or something." Alfred said, and she laughed under her breath, unaware that he was being completely serious and that his alcohol induced panic that night had decided that was the only logical conclusion, that his parents and Arthur's were just close enough to enter into a plural marriage and forgot to inform their kids, nothing more, nothing less. "Arthur said his parents didn't act differently either."

"Seamus and I both agree that we saw this coming." She admitted, and Alfred was concerned for a split second that now his mom and Arthur's dad were going to get hitched, though she rolled her eyes soon after. "That man. He called me in tears the evening your father told me he wanted a divorce. What with the accent and all, I could hardly understand what he was saying."

Sometimes Alfred forgot Arthur was born overseas since he didn't have much of an accent like his parents. He drank tea – though apparently a lot of people do and Alfred just never noticed until Arthur started doing it – and he emphasized his curses with a few "bloody's" too many. The American sometimes wished that Arthur had more of a British inflection, if only because it was decidedly a turn on.

Not that Alfred thought it was sexy when Arthur's parents spoke. Dear God, no. It would probably just sound exceedingly hot with Arthur, is all.

"Visitation is gonna suck." Alfred sighed, and his mom smiled sadly, reaching over to rub her eldest son's shoulder, trying to comfort him in probably the only way he'd allow at the moment. "I don't want to be a dick, but I don't think I'll be able to help it either."

"Just be yourself." His mom said, and he was suddenly reminded of why he'd ultimately decided to leave with her. "No one can blame you for being upset, Al. Knowing you, you'll just hole up in your room and only come out for dinner. Just try not to be too much of a piss-ant, alright?"

"Ha. I'll try."

"And look on the bright side." The phone rang then, and the woman kissed her son on the cheek briefly before standing to go answer it. "At least now you and Arthur can legitimately call yourselves brothers after all this time."

* * *

The first chance they got to be completely alone was on the first weekend of their new visitation schedule with their newly wedded parents, when the adults were gone and Matthew was out bowling with friends. Arthur had overseen the whole thing so any and all of his future visits coincided with Alfred's, refusing to be in Alfred's old home and around his mother and stepfather without his boyfriend around.

"What are you doing?" Arthur didn't normally attack him anywhere that wasn't one of their bedrooms, so Alfred wasn't quite sure how to react when Arthur started coming on to him.

"Reaffirming my claim." Arthur said shortly, pulling aside the collar of Alfred's shirt and scowling when he noticed the fading bruises on his skin. Alfred himself had noticed just the other day and couldn't say he wasn't relieved when Arthur's mouth latched onto his skin. He didn't mind walking around school with the marks exposed, enjoyed seeing the smug look on Arthur's face whenever one of their mutual friends pointed them out. "This whole thing is ridiculous."

"Tell me about it." Alfred said, grabbing onto Arthur's leg to pull the other boy into straddling his thighs and grasping at the back of Arthur's head with the other. "I caught, _ah_ – Caught my mom crying over dinner last night."

"All my dad wants to do is spend time with me. It's as if he's afraid I'll leave next." Arthur muttered. The frustrated melancholy in his tone was consuming, and Alfred found it was hard to focus on what they were doing momentarily, stroking the area on Arthur's side where he knew his tattoo to be. "Luckily for him, I'm not promiscuous enough to up and leave my family for my significant other."

Alfred swallowed, tilting his head over the edge of the couch to stare at the ceiling. "Coulda fooled me."

"May I ride you?" Alfred blinked a few times, mouth agape, though Arthur was already tearing his shirt off, lust and cold determination battling for dominance over his expression. It obviously hadn't been a question, more like a statement or demand. "I can't say it won't be amusing to watch my mother sit here later to watch her shows, unaware that her son and stepson fucked in the exact same spot only hours previously."

That made more sense, as twisted as it sounded. Arthur didn't offer to bottom often, though Alfred had a feeling his boyfriend would most likely be in control regardless of position or whose dick was inside who. "Whatever works." Alfred said, thankful that he'd thought to close the blinds as he started to unzip his jeans. "But you're getting up to find lube. No way in Hell I'm taking you raw ever again. You bitch enough when you aren't in pain."

* * *

Alfred was busy trying to stuff his Calculus and Government books into his locker when someone poked his shoulder.

"Dear God, your locker is worse than your room."

"Fuck off." Alfred said, glaring at his younger brother, who only smirked in return. "Whaddya want?"

"Are you coming to Dad's after school?"

"Only for a bit. I have two Valentines this year, dude, gotta keep them happy."

"You whore. Are you having dinner with Mom and then going out with Arthur or something?"

"Kinda. Arthur's gonna have dinner with Mom and me, and then he and I are going out after."

Matthew frowned. "What did you tell Mom?"

"That Arthur likes to get drunk on Valentine's Day to suppress the pain of not having a girlfriend and I'm going to chaperone him for the night."

Matthew had a nice laugh at that, and Alfred slammed his locker shut once he'd managed to locate his books for his next class amongst all the crap that had been piling up since the beginning of the semester. Junior year had been an absolute nightmare thus far, and Alfred was struggling to keep his head above water, though it might have been his lingering resentment over his father's marriage only a few weeks ago that was making life increasingly difficult to endure.

"You'll have to say something eventually."

"Eventually, but not today. Anyway, why do you need to know where I'll be after school?"

"I kinda need a ride. Lucie restricted my driving privileges until I get my science grade up."

Alfred frowned, and Matt winced slightly, probably wishing he hadn't said a word. "And Dad let her?"

"Well, it was a mutual grounding. She did do most of the talking, I guess."

It had only been a few weeks, not that Alfred was surprised it had taken Arthur's mom so little time to take the reins and start bossing them around like she was their mom as well as Arthur's. Alfred hadn't blown a fuse yet, but only because Arthur was pretty skilled at sensing his moods and redirecting a conversation before Alfred did something he'd regret.

"I'll drive you." Alfred said eventually, glad that he'd decided to let the subject drop when he saw the relief in his brother's expression. "And I'll tutor you in science if you want."

"Thanks. And… Dad misses having you around, you know."

"Yeah, well… I guess I miss having a _reason_ to be around."

* * *

"Is this a bloody intervention?"

"You think they'll send us off to some Pray the Gay Away camp, Artie?"

"I'd honestly like to see them try."

"Boys!" Alfred's father snapped, effectively quieting the teenagers. "This has nothing to do with your sexualities as it does the fact that what you're doing is highly inappropriate."

"To be fair, I liked Arthur _way_ before you started liking Lucie." Alfred said indignantly, and both his dad and Arthur shot him severe looks. "What?"

"You two are brothers, just as much as you and Matthew are, Al." Lucie said, shooting a helpless glance at her ex-husband, who shrugged in response.

Alfred hadn't asked for this to happen, wasn't sure what to expect when he got to his dad's and found his parents and Arthur's sitting around in the living room with strained looks on their faces. He hadn't known what was happening until Arthur wandered in nearly ten minutes later. Apparently Lucie had been looking through Arthur's text messages and found something incriminating, and from the awkward fidgeting she'd done when she said as much, he was pretty certain she'd come across his and Arthur's pretty epic sexting extravaganza from the past weekend.

"That's a ridiculous and short-sighted deduction." Arthur replied stubbornly, and his grip on Alfred's hand tightened. The younger of the two boys glanced up nervously to find his mother eyeing their hands, though when she looked up to meet his gaze, she didn't look angry; only saddened, as if she'd known this would happen but had wanted to protect them for as long as she could. Alfred had a feeling she'd figured it out a while ago but didn't say anything for their benefit. "It's not as if Alfred and I asked for you both to abandon your duties to your families and ultimately ruin a wonderful thing."

"Be a gentleman about this, Arthur." Arthur's dad said at length, speaking for the first time that day. Alfred liked Seamus Kirkland, really he did, but the guy was lacking in the backbone area after spending nearly seventeen years married to Lucie. "We're all just concerned."

"No offense or anything, but I don't see how what Arthur and I do together is any of your guys' business." Alfred said, wincing when his mom turned a little green. She didn't really like the thought of him being sexually active and never had. "Arthur's eighteen and I will be once the school year ends. We're basically adults now, we can make our own decisions."

"Obviously not. We give you an ounce of freedom and _this _is what you do with it!" Alfred's dad exclaimed, extending his arms out in an almost pleading gesture, and Alfred narrowed his eyes, refusing to believe that what he had with Arthur was something to be ashamed of. They'd been right to keep it a secret all this time, but the very fact that they'd even had to in the first place was utter bullshit. "Family doesn't – "

"Shut the fuck up!" Alfred snapped, tearing his hand out of Arthur's and shooting to his feet, glaring over at his father who glared at him in return. "That's all I've been hearing for the past couple months, 'Gee, it must be cool to go from best friends to brothers, you guys,' or, 'You both look out for each other, you're brothers now!' You know what? It's _not_ cool, it's _not _fun, and I'm not gonna sit here and let you make me feel like a scumbag for fucking my stepbrother when he was my boyfriend first! Stop acting like I'm trying to screw Mattie or something, because this is completely different!"

His father apparently had nothing to say, and Alfred rolled his eyes, biting the inside of his cheek to fight off furious tears. "Alfred!" Arthur called worriedly as he stormed out of the living room and out the front door, fumbling for his keys and cursing under his breath when he noticed that some of the neighbors were outside, straying from their various tasks to watch as he clambered into his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.

But he couldn't muster the necessary concentration to safely drive back to his mom's, let alone start his car, so he ended up resting his weight against the steering wheel, burying his face in his arms and breathing deeply until someone climbed into the passenger seat.

A hand was placed on his shoulder, and Alfred didn't have to look up to know that it was his mother. "I fucked up, didn't I?"

"It was wrong of us to bombard you both like that. Your father called me at work and said it was an emergency, nothing more. If I'd known what this was really about, I wouldn't have agreed to it at all."

"How did you know?"

"I once found a few of your New Years Resolutions lists. Every year for the past five years, you put down 'Come out.' I guess I didn't suspect anything between you and Arthur for a while, but I've known, Al."

"I love him." Alfred said when he finally worked up the courage to meet his mom's gaze, and such an honest statement from him seemed to shock her into momentary silence. Alfred himself felt a bit disoriented, couldn't believe he'd admitted to something he hadn't even told Arthur yet after nearly five years of messing around. "I really do. Dad and Lucie messed everything up."

"They're making it more complicated than it needs to be. Would you mind coming back inside? Arthur started crying after you left, and Lucie can't get him to stop."

Alfred jolted in his seat, mentally berating himself for completely losing his head and leaving Arthur alone in the middle of that ambush. For all Arthur liked to act tough, he hated confrontation. Not to mention that neither of them had been in a fight without the other at his side before.

His mother started to exit the car, still in her work uniform and wearing a tired but determined smile on her face. "Seamus and I will try to talk some sense into them. Don't you worry, Al. Everything will be okay."

* * *

Alfred had a new-found hatred for New Years parties, though at least he could say that this year's wasn't nearly as awful as the previous one.

It was held at his childhood house as always, the one Matthew still shared with their father and stepmother. Alfred actually had to be bribed into going, both by his mom and by Arthur, though the prospect of twenty dollars and a blowjob did little to curb his contempt for that house and everyone in it.

Their parents actually got along now, could be in the same room without attempting to strangle one another or fighting over visitation, though Alfred could tell his mom and Arthur's dad were still getting over the heartbreak. Since the beginning of the year, Alfred had come to terms with his parents' divorce and now understood that sometimes couples grew further apart over time, though sometimes he caught himself wondering if he could have done anything differently to deter the breakup, like acquired a better attitude or stopped being the skeptic that he was.

Thoughts like that got him nowhere though, and Alfred had become pretty good at stopping his train of thought if things were heading in a dangerous direction.

"Al?"

"Hm?" Alfred glanced over his shoulder from his spot at the bar in his dad's basement as heavy footsteps sounded on the stairs. "Oh, hey, Arthur."

The other boy frowned once he reached the last step, regarding Alfred with reserved worry. "What are you doing down here on your own?"

"Oh, you know. Ringing in the New Year in the seventh layer of Hell. What made you decide to join me? Aren't you gonna watch the ball drop on the TV with everyone else?"

Arthur shrugged, hopping up onto the bar-stool beside Alfred easily with a tired huff. "The concept lost its novelty years ago. And I can only stand to see my parents make drunken fools of themselves for so long. Are you… drinking _milk_?"

Alfred nodded, grinning against the rim of his glass as Arthur turned to laugh behind his hand. "After last year, I figured it was better to be safe than sorry."

"You shouldn't have been drinking anyway."

"Well, thanks for cleaning me up after I barfed all over you."

Arthur was silent for a time, and Alfred heard something heavy hit the floor upstairs, and he took a moment to pray that no one had died and nothing was broken. "Are you feeling okay, Al?"

"As okay as I'll ever be. Why?"

"You called me Arthur when I came down."

"Don't you hate it when I call you Artie?"

"Well, yes, but at least I know you feel well enough to be a twat when you insist on calling me that."

"Oh. Sorry."

Alfred finished off his glass while Arthur studied him quietly, fingertips drumming on the top of the counter as he contemplated what to say next. "This year was awful."

"I'm glad to see it go." Alfred replied instantly, practically able to feel himself slipping into an even darker mood as he thought of all the fuckery they'd had to deal with over the past twelve months. "Next year will probably be just as awful, but at least now we can kiss each other whenever and wherever we want."

It took a while, but they were finally able to convince Alfred's dad and Lucie that despite their best efforts, their marriage did nothing to bind Arthur and Alfred together in the way they'd initially intended, and that they'd had no right to try and spoil something that had existed long before they ever took interest in one another. Alfred still didn't feel comfortable with visiting and was thankful that he was soon to be eighteen so he wouldn't have to come back if he didn't want to, but things weren't nearly as unbearable as before.

Granted, he and Arthur had stricter rules and weren't allowed to spend suspiciously long amounts of time behind closed doors, but the two teenagers had never been ones to waste time anyway.

"That does sound lovely." Arthur admitted, and when Alfred met his gaze, he was surprised to find that Arthur's jade eyes were clear and intense. "Alfred, how would you like to go to prom together?"

Alfred blinked. "You mean… in May?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. "That is when our prom is, yes."

"But – " It wasn't like Alfred was truly complaining; he only felt astounded. They hadn't gone to their junior prom at all, choosing instead to stay home and marathon the first season of Supernatural. Alfred hadn't minded any, but it had bothered him that they couldn't go out and just have fun because of their parents. "Are you sure?"

"It's not like I care what other people think. If they see us together and still insist on calling us brothers, well, that's their problem. I for one want to escort you to our senior prom, if you'll let me."

Alfred stayed silent for a time, if only so Arthur would become uncomfortable and squirm restlessly for a few precious moments, but he did smirk eventually. "How come I can't escort you?"

"We'll escort each other." Arthur amended, smiling wolfishly when fireworks started to sound from outside, startling Alfred enough to have him jolting in his seat. "I think this year will be different, Al. I'll certainly make it memorable for you, I promise you that."

"I believe you." Alfred said, and the grin that spread across his face was foreign and strange, but it felt nice, almost overdue, and it was certainly worth it when Arthur smiled back at him just as brightly.

The guests upstairs were starting to count down, the year was _finally_ drawing to a close, and Alfred took the opportunity to take the cliché New Years kiss that his dad and step-mom had stolen from him last year; and for once, he was all too happy to be cautiously optimistic.

* * *

_A.N._ Well, I had fun with it. Here's to the new year and that it won't be as suck-tastic as 2013! Let's all be cautiously optimistic, yeah?!


End file.
